5 signs you need more alone time & how to get the benefits
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, CDCES, MBA
Learn the mental health benefits of alone time, the signs you need it & how to get more time alone. Plus, how to know if you're spending too much time alone.
For many people, scheduling alone time isn’t always a priority. And we get it. With the constant demands of work, family, and social obligations, it's easy to overlook the importance of spending time by yourself.
However, the next time you find yourself with nothing to do, don’t rush to make plans. Prioritizing alone time can help support your mental health and overall wellbeing, as it allows you to recharge, reflect, and do things that bring you joy and peace.
Why is alone time important? 5 mental health benefits
Spending time alone can bring balance to your life, giving your mind the space it needs to relax, think, and grow.
Enhances creativity
Improves self-awareness
Enhances focus and productivity
5 signs you need more time alone
If you notice any of these signs, it might be time to prioritize alone time.
1. You feel overwhelmed
It’s easy to be overwhelmed by the demands of work, school, or your personal life. Constantly feeling stressed or anxious may be a sign that you need more alone time.
2. You’re experiencing irritability and a short temper
When you're constantly surrounded by people and their demands, it can wear on your patience. You might notice yourself snapping at others more than usual.
3. You can’t focus
Difficulty concentrating or completing tasks can be a sign that you’re too distracted. Difficulty focusing may indicate that you’re just tapped out.
4. You feel physically exhausted
Feeling tired all the time, even after a good night's sleep, can result from constantly being on and available to others.
5. You crave alone time
You might often find yourself looking forward to moments when you can be by yourself and feeling relief when it happens. You may even feel happiest when you're alone.
How to get more alone time
Finding ways to incorporate more alone time into your daily routine can help you recharge and protect your mental health. Regular solitude can help you feel more balanced, focused, and ready to take on life’s challenges.
Schedule time for yourself
Make solitude a priority in your daily or weekly routine. Plan specific times you can be alone and mark them on your calendar like any other appointment or non-negotiable commitment. Even 15–30 minutes of activities that you like or find relaxing—such as reading, meditating, or taking a walk—can make a big difference for your mental health.
💙 Set aside time to check in with yourself when you Schedule Me-tings into your week.
Set boundaries
Let family, friends, and coworkers know you need time to take care of your wellbeing. Be firm but polite, and explain how alone time can help you be more present when you’re with them.
💙 Listen to The Daily Trip’s A Secret to Better Boundaries for guidance on setting boundaries with loved ones.
Create personal space
Choose a quiet, comfortable area in your home that’s free from distractions and interruptions, and make it inviting and relaxing by adding elements like soft lighting, comfortable seating, and your favorite books or music.
💙 Add some music to bring a chill vibe to your personal space, like the Infinite Ambient for Relaxation Soundscape.
Engage in solitary activities
Find hobbies or activities you enjoy doing alone to help you feel more fulfilled and relaxed, such as reading, journaling, crafting, gardening, or walking. This can help boost your mood and creativity.
💙 Lace up your sneakers and pop in your headphones for an Everyday Walk that can help you feel more at ease in just 10 minutes.
Mindfully disconnect
Turn off notifications on your devices during your alone time so you can be present in the moment and make the most of your solitude. Set specific times of the day to check your emails or social media to help you disconnect without feeling like you're missing out.
💙 Step away from technology and toward relaxation with The Daily Move’s Screen Off, Sleep On guided exercise.
Take short breaks
Step outside for some fresh air, close your eyes and breathe deeply, or take a brief walk around your home or office. Small breaks can provide you with the time to yourself you need throughout the day.
💙 Try Chibs Okereke’s One-Minute Reset breathing meditation for a quick way to take a mindful break.
Use alone time for self-care
Schedule activities that help you relax and feel rejuvenated, such as a bath, yoga, or listening to calming music. These can enhance your mental and physical wellbeing.
💙 Reset with gratitude, self-care, and self-love with Calm’s 7 Days of Happiness series.
Alone vs lonely: how to know if you’re spending too much time alone?
While alone time is essential for your mental health and wellbeing, it's important to recognize when you’ve had too much solitude.
Feeling lonely
Feeling sad, empty, or disconnected from others can show it’s time to be more social. Chronic loneliness or isolation can indicate that you’ve had too much alone time. When you feel like this, get in touch with friends or family members, join a club or group, or look for activities that help you connect with others.
Uninterested in social activities
If you find yourself making excuses to skip social events, or not returning calls or messages, it may be a sign of social withdrawal. Set small, manageable goals to engage with others. Start by attending a social event for a short period, or call a friend for a casual catch-up.
Decline in mental health
Increased anxiety, depression, feelings of despair and hopelessness, or other mental health issues can indicate you’re alone too much. A therapist or counselor can provide support and strategies to help you reconnect with others and improve your mental health.
Losing interest in socializing
If you no longer enjoy activities that involve social interaction, or you prefer to be alone even when you’re given the chance to be with others, it might be time to evaluate your social habits. Reintroduce social activities gradually. Group hobbies or volunteer opportunities may help you.
Hearing feedback from others
Loved ones may notice changes in your behavior or mood that you might not have noticed. Take their feedback seriously and make an effort to balance your alone and social time.
How to find the right balance between alone time and social interaction: 9 tips
With a few strategies, you can find a balance between alone time and social interaction that works for you.
1. Listen to your needs
Pay attention to how you feel after spending time alone compared with socializing. If you feel refreshed and happy after socializing, you might need more time with others. If you feel drained, you may need more alone time.
2. Prioritize quality over quantity
Spend more time with people who uplift and support you. This can be more beneficial than having many superficial social interactions. Focus on building deep, fulfilling relationships with a few close friends or family members. Genuine connections can bring heartfelt conversations, shared experiences, and mutual support.
3. Set personal limits
Know when to say no to social invitations to make time for your alone time. It’s okay to decline an invitation if you need time to recharge. Be honest with others about your needs and don't feel guilty about prioritizing your wellbeing.
4. Make time for social activities
Gradually add social activities into your routine to maintain a healthy balance. If you tend to spend too much time alone, start by scheduling one or two social activities each week. Try joining a club, attending a class, or meeting a friend for coffee. As you become more comfortable, increase the frequency of these activities to create a routine that helps you stay connected with others.
5. Engage in shared interests
Find activities you enjoy and that also involve social interaction to make it easier to connect with others who share your interests. This can help create a balance between alone time and socializing. Join a sports team, book club, or hobby group.
6. Seek professional guidance
Consult a therapist or counselor if you struggle to find the right balance. They can provide personalized strategies and support to help you manage your social interactions and alone time effectively. Therapy can also help address any underlying issues you may have, such as social anxiety or depression.
7. Build a support system
Surround yourself with people who understand and respect your need for both alone time and social interaction. A supportive network can provide encouragement and help you maintain a healthy balance.
8. Make alone time enjoyable
Ensure your alone time is fulfilling and enjoyable. Relax and recharge with activities you love, like reading, gardening, or another hobby. It’s important to make your alone time something you look forward to.
9. Reflect and adjust
Life circumstances change, and so do your needs. Regularly assess how you’re feeling and whether you need more solitary or social time. Be flexible to help you maintain a healthy balance.
Alone time FAQs
How long should you spend alone each day?
The amount of alone time you need each day can vary based on your personal needs and lifestyle. Start with 30–60 minutes a day for activities like reading, meditating, or simply sitting quietly. Listen to your body and mind — if you feel refreshed and recharged after your alone time, you're likely getting enough. If you still feel overwhelmed or stressed, you might need a little more.
Why do some people need more alone time than others?
Individual differences, such as personality types and life circumstances, can affect the need for alone time. Introverts, for example, typically require more solitude to recharge than extroverts, who gain energy from social interactions. If you have a demanding job or a busy household, you might crave alone time to decompress. Understanding your unique needs can help you find the right balance.
Why am I sometimes happier alone?
Being alone can allow self-reflection, relaxation, and enjoyable activities, which can enhance happiness. Alone time can give you the freedom to do what you love without interruptions or the need to meet others' expectations. This can bring a deeper sense of contentment and personal satisfaction. Alone time can also help you process your thoughts and emotions, leading to greater self-understanding and emotional balance.
How can I balance alone time with family responsibilities?
Balancing alone time with family responsibilities can be challenging, but it’s possible to get the alone time you need for your wellbeing without neglecting your loved ones. Of course, every family functions differently, but these strategies may help you.
Communicate your needs: Talk to your family about how alone time is critical for your mental health. Explain how it helps you recharge and be more engaged when you're with others.
Schedule alone time: Plan specific times for solitude in your daily routine. Even short breaks can make a difference. For example, get up a little earlier to enjoy quiet time before the family wakes, or take a walk alone after dinner.
Share responsibilities: Distribute household chores among family members to create some free time for yourself.
Use downtime: Take advantage of moments when the family is engaged in activities, such as watching TV or doing homework, to sneak in some alone time.
Set boundaries: Let your family know when you need a break. Create a signal or a specific spot in the house that indicates you're taking some time for yourself, so they understand not to disturb you.
Calm your mind. Change your life.
Mental health is hard. Getting support doesn't have to be. The Calm app puts the tools to feel better in your back pocket, with personalized content to manage stress and anxiety, get better sleep, and feel more present in your life.
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