How to set family goals (and why they're important)
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, CDCES, MBA
Discover what family goals are, including why they're important and how to set your own. Plus, 18 examples of goals to strengthen your family unit.
When was the last time you sat around a table with your family and really talked? If it’s been awhile, it might be time to start setting some family goals to help you reconnect and rest.
No matter how close your family is, there are probably moments now and then when you feel a bit disconnected. With work and school, extracurricular activities, and social obligations, it’s easy to drift apart every now and then.
By considering how you want to improve various aspects of your lives, such as getting in better shape, learning new skills, saving money, or just having more fun, you can strengthen your bonds and grow closer together. Here’s how to do it.
What are family goals?
Family goals are shared objectives that family members work toward together. They can be whatever you want them to be, but many people choose to focus on areas like relationships, health, education, and overall wellbeing.
When a family sits down together to create their goals, they must first identify what’s important to them. These values become the foundation upon which goals are built. For example, a family that prioritizes health might set a goal to exercise together three times a week.
Achieving family goals requires collective effort. Each member of the family has a role to play, and everyone’s contributions are essential. This teamwork encourages a sense of responsibility and accountability, as each person understands their part in reaching the goal.
8 reasons why family goals are important
Setting family goals comes with many benefits. They not only strengthen the family unit but also support the wellbeing and development of each individual member. Family goals can lead to:
Enhanced communication: Being on the same page makes it easier to resolve misunderstandings and build trust within the family.
Stronger bonds: When each family member feels valued and supported, there’s a sense of unity and belonging. And, as we know from research, that’s one of the keys to long-term happiness.
Structure and direction: With a greater sense of focus, everyone knows how to manage their time more effectively.
Motivation: Seeing progress and realizing your efforts are making a difference can inspire you to keep going and strive for more.
Positive impact on a child’s development: If there’s a child in your family, it can be helpful for them to observe and practice goal-setting, teamwork, problem-solving, and persistence.
Family resilience: Collective problem-solving can strengthen your family’s ability to cope with difficulties and adapt to changes.
Enhancing health: Setting goals that encourage families to adopt healthier lifestyles can boost everyone’s physical wellbeing.
Improved overall happiness and satisfaction: Goals provide direction, a sense of accomplishment, and a purpose that enhances daily life.
How to set goals as a family in 6 steps
Setting family goals is a collaborative process that requires input from everyone. By following these steps, you can ensure that your goals are clear, achievable, and meaningful to each family member.
1. Gather together
Find a time when everyone is available to sit down and have a conversation. Remember that this is meant to be a comfortable and fun experience, so consider doing it over a meal or snacks. Your goal is to set the stage for open communication and show that everyone’s opinions matter. This creates a sense of unity and purpose from the start.
💙 Explore how to have meaningful conversations with Jay Shetty’s Deeper Communication session.
2. Discuss each person’s values and priorities
Let each family member share their values and priorities. This might include health, education, financial stability, or spending quality time together. Ensure everyone feels comfortable expressing their thoughts and feelings. Ask questions like, “What do you think our family needs to focus on?” or “What makes you feel happy and supported?”
💙 Not sure what your values are? Learn how to outline them with the Delineate Your Values meditation.
3. Set specific, measurable goals
Make sure your goals are specific and measurable. Instead of a vague goal like “spend more time together,” you might consider setting a goal like, “have a family game night every Friday.” Set goals that are realistic and attainable. Consider the time, resources, and effort required to achieve each goal. Try setting SMART (specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound) goals. This will make it easier to track your progress.
💙 The Shared Goal, Different Approach meditation can help you learn how to incorporate everyone’s ideas.
4. Assign roles and responsibilities
Assign tasks and roles to each family member so that everyone knows what they need to do and contributes to the goal. For example, if the goal is to exercise together, one person might research activities while another plans the schedule.
Make sure responsibilities are distributed fairly based on each person’s strengths, interests, and availability. Highlight the importance of working together and supporting each other. You’re a team after all.
💙 Learn to see your family members for who they really are and cultivate healthier relationships with our Relationships With Others series.
5. Create an action plan
Break down the goal into smaller, manageable steps and set deadlines for each one. For example, if the goal is to create a garden, plan out when to buy seeds, prepare the soil, and plant. Make a checklist or action plan that details each step, and discuss potential challenges and how you will address them.
💙 Just Start is a great meditation for anyone looking to begin a new practice (like meditation, for example).
6. Carve out time for regular check-ins
Plan to meet regularly to review progress, discuss any challenges, and make adjustments as needed. These meetings can be weekly, bi-weekly, or monthly, depending on what works for you. Be flexible, and celebrate small achievements along the way.
💙 Reflection is a powerful tool when you’re finding new ways of working together.
18 examples of family goals to help you get started
Setting specific, achievable family goals can significantly improve your family's relationships, health, education, finances, and overall happiness. Here are some examples, but remember that it’s important to set goals that make sense for you and your family.
Health and wellness
1. Commit to regular family exercise: Go for a family bike ride every Saturday morning or take a walk on Friday evenings.
2. Healthy eating habits: Plan meals in advance and involve everyone in the process. You might consider trying a new recipe together once a week.
3. Mental health practices: Set aside 10 minutes each day for a family meditation session or practice gratitude by sharing what you're thankful for each evening at dinner.
Education and personal growth
4. Support each other’s learning: Read a book together each month, attend educational workshops, or visit museums. A more specific goal could be to read and discuss one chapter of a book every week.
5. Pursue hobbies: Set aside an hour every weekend for each family member to work on a personal hobby and share their progress with the family.
6. Attend cultural events: Attend local cultural events, such as theater performances, art exhibits, or music concerts. You could aim to attend one per month as a family.
Financial
7. Create a family budget: Create and stick to a budget. Track expenses and savings, and set financial goals like saving a specific amount of money each month toward an emergency fund.
8. Save for a trip: Go somewhere new. Decide on a destination, estimate the costs, and create a savings plan. Save a certain amount each month, and involve everyone in finding ways to contribute.
9. Start a family business: Consider starting a small business together. This could be a weekend market stall, an online shop, or a service like dog walking. Set clear goals for each stage of the business, such as developing a plan, creating a website, and making your first sale.
Quality time
10. Plan weekly family activities: This could be game nights, movie nights, or outdoor activities. A more specific goal could be to watch a movie together every Friday.
11. Monthly outings: This could be visiting a park, going to a museum, or having a picnic. Explore a new place or try a new activity each month. Maybe each family member gets to pick somewhere they’d like to visit so it keeps outings fair and interesting!
12. Family vacations: Plan and take vacations together to create (hopefully!) happy memories. Whether it's a weekend getaway or a longer trip, aim to have at least one family vacation each year.
Community involvement
13. Volunteer together: Volunteer at a local shelter, participate in community clean-up events, or help at a food bank. Set a goal to volunteer together once a month.
14. Participate in local events: Get involved in your community by attending local events, such as fairs, festivals, or neighborhood meetings. You might try to attend one every quarter.
15. Support a cause: Choose a cause to support as a family. Raise funds, spread awareness, or participate in events related to the cause.
Home environment
16. Organize your home: Set goals for each area of the house, such as organizing the kitchen, cleaning out the garage, or creating a more efficient storage system. Try to declutter one room each month.
17. Create a family chore chart: Assign specific tasks to each family member and rotate them regularly. Review and update the chore chart every few months.
18. Start a garden: Decide what to grow, assign tasks for planting and maintenance, and enjoy the fruits (and vegetables!) of your labor together. Plant and maintain a vegetable garden with at least five different types of vegetables.
Family goals FAQs
How do we keep everyone motivated to achieve family goals?
Acknowledge and celebrate milestones along the way. This can be as simple as a high-five, a special treat, or a small family outing. Celebrations keep everyone motivated and excited about the progress being made.
Regularly check in with each other to discuss how things are going. Share successes and challenges openly. Encouraging each family member to voice their feelings and thoughts helps maintain enthusiasm and addresses any issues promptly.
Make goal-related activities fun. If the goal is to eat healthier, make cooking a fun family activity by trying new recipes together. If the goal is to exercise, choose activities that everyone enjoys, like a family dance-off or a hike in a scenic area.
Ensure that goals are realistic and within reach. Break larger goals into smaller, manageable tasks so that progress can be seen and felt regularly. This helps to maintain momentum and prevent frustration.
Use visual aids like a goal chart or a family vision board to track progress. Place it in a common area where everyone can see it. Visual reminders keep the goals top of mind and provide a sense of accomplishment as you see your progress.
Offer positive reinforcement and encouragement. Recognize everyone’s efforts and support each other when challenges arise
What if we encounter conflicts while setting family goals?
You may encounter conflicts when you’re setting family goals (families will be families, after all!), but there are strategies you can use to move forward. Start by calling another family meeting to listen to everyone’s concerns. Set guidelines for discussions to ensure that they remain respectful and productive, and agree on rules like taking turns to speak and focusing on solutions rather than blame. At the meeting, ensure that each family member has an opportunity to express their opinions and concerns.
Look for solutions that accommodate everyone’s needs and preferences. For example, if there’s a conflict about the type of family activity to do, suggest alternating between different activities that each member enjoys. Keep the conversation focused on your shared values and common objectives.
If there are still disagreements, consider having a neutral family member or friend help facilitate the discussion to provide a fresh perspective. Remember that conflicts are a natural part of any group effort. Be patient and flexible in your approach, and be willing to revisit and revise goals as needed.
How often should we review and update our family goals?
You could start with scheduling monthly meetings to review progress and make any necessary adjustments. Be open to changing goals based on new circumstances or insights. If a goal isn’t relevant anymore or needs to be modified, discuss it and agree on any necessary changes. Once you achieve your goals, set new ones to keep the family moving forward.
These review meetings are also opportunities to celebrate progress and recognize everyone’s efforts. Positive reinforcement keeps motivation high and reinforces the importance of working together. Keep track of your goals by using tools like calendars, apps, or goal charts. Regular reminders help keep the goals top of mind and ensure that everyone is aware of upcoming review meetings.
Can family goals help improve our relationships with extended family?
Yes, family goals can help improve relationships with extended family — especially if one of your goals is to visit extended family members regularly! This might include monthly dinners, weekend trips, or holiday gatherings. If regular visits are challenging to organize, you could plan and organize large family reunions. This could be an annual event where extended family members come together to catch up and bond.
To keep those who live a long way away in the loop, try regular video calls, group chats, or social media groups. Aim to have a virtual family gathering once a month, or a cadence that works for you. You could even work on projects that involve extended family members. This could be a family history project, a collective recipe book, or a shared photo album.
You could also consider setting goals to support extended family members in their endeavors. This could include attending their events, celebrating their successes, or helping out in times of need. Demonstrating support and solidarity strengthens a sense of family unity.
How do we celebrate achieving our family goals?
Acknowledge efforts: A simple acknowledgment goes a long way in making everyone feel valued and proud of their contributions.Take time to recognize and appreciate the efforts of each family member.
Have a special family event: This could be a day at the park, a trip to the zoo, or a special dinner. Choose an activity that everyone enjoys and make it memorable.
Create a tangible memory: Having a physical reminder of your accomplishment, such as a photo album, a scrapbook, or a framed certificate, reinforces the positive experience.
Give small rewards: Say thank you with a favorite treat, a new book, or a fun outing. Rewards provide an extra incentive and make the celebration special. Who doesn’t like a reward?
Reflect and share: Discuss the challenges you faced, the skills you developed, and how it felt to achieve the goal together. This helps reinforce the value of setting and achieving goals as a family.
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