What is Stoicism? Plus, 12 ways to use it in your everyday life
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA
Stoicism offers tools for handling stress and uncertainty. Learn what Stoicism is, its benefits, and 12 practical ways to apply it for a calmer daily mindset.
Stress doesn’t always hit like a crisis. Sometimes, it builds slowly — through missed deadlines, tense conversations, or the pressure to keep up with everything and everyone at once. Even on relatively normal days, it can leave you feeling mentally scrambled and emotionally drained.
This is where Stoicism can be useful. It’s an ancient philosophy rooted in clear, practical ideas about navigating uncertainty. At its core, Stoicism teaches you to focus on what you can control and let go of the rest, which can be an especially helpful approach when life feels unpredictable or overwhelming. Contrary to popular belief, it doesn’t mean having a lack of emotion. Instead, it teaches you to respond with intention rather than react only with emotion.
We’ll explore what Stoicism is, how its core principles apply to everyday life, and a few accessible ways to try it for yourself so you can move through stress with a little more steadiness and clarity.
What is Stoicism?
Stoicism began in ancient Greece, but it isn’t a dusty philosophy only meant for scholars. It was designed as a practical guide for everyday life, especially in the face of difficulty. The Stoics believed we can’t always control what happens around us, but we can control how we respond.
At its core, Stoicism is about living with clarity, steadiness, and purpose. It doesn’t ask you to ignore feelings or detach from life. Instead, it invites you to pause, reflect, and act in ways that align with your values — even when the world around you feels unpredictable.
The 4 core Stoic values
The Stoics organized their teachings around four guiding values, which still hold up today as touchstones for making choices and handling challenges. Below are the four core Stoic values, and how they can relate to everyday life:
1. Wisdom: Wisdom is about seeing clearly what you can control and what you can’t. It means making choices based on reason instead of impulse. So while you can’t stop a coworker’s bad mood, you can decide to stay calm and not mirror it.
2. Courage: Courage shows up in the small, everyday moments as much as the big ones. It’s the willingness to face discomfort instead of avoiding it, like having a hard conversation, asking for support, or owning up to a mistake.
3. Justice: Justice is about fairness, kindness, and responsibility toward others. In practice, it’s treating people with respect, even when tensions run high, and stepping up to help when someone needs support.
4. Self-control: Self-control means aligning your actions with your values, rather than reacting to every impulse. It might be resisting the urge to fire off an angry text or choosing sleep over another round of late-night scrolling.
Read more: Stoic wisdom for modern life
What are the benefits of Stoicism for modern life?
Modern life is full of pressures like tight deadlines, family responsibilities, money stress, and a constant stream of news that can feel overwhelming. While Stoicism doesn’t erase those realities, it can equip you with tools to handle them more steadily.
Research has found that Stoic practices like reflection, reframing challenges, and focusing on what you can influence can improve resilience and reduce anxiety. Most of this research is still emerging and based on smaller-scale studies, but the results are promising.
Here are some potential benefits of stoicism, based on current research:
Lower stress by channeling energy into what you can actually change
More emotional balance in conflicts and tough conversations
Clearer decision-making when the stakes feel high
Greater resilience after setbacks or disappointments
A stronger sense of purpose by living in line with your values
How to build a Stoic mindset: 12 ancient exercises for overcoming challenges
Developing a more Stoic perspective on the world can help you feel more grounded during times of stress. These exercises are rooted in classic Stoic philosophy, but they’ve been adapted for modern, messy life. Each tip offers two ways in: a short version for when time is tight, and a deeper exploration for when you have a few extra minutes. They’re meant to help you find steadiness in small, everyday moments.
1. Focus on what’s within your control
Stress often builds when we try to manage things that aren’t in our control. Stoic thinking can remind you that peace comes from knowing the difference between what we can change and what we can’t. You can’t force someone to reply faster or change the weather, but you can absolutely choose how you respond.
Quick version (30–60 seconds): Ask, “Is this in my control?” Do the part that is. Release the part that isn’t.
Deeper version (3–5 minutes): Make two lists: “Mine” (my choices, my actions) and “Not mine” (other people’s behavior, outcomes). Choose one thing from the “Mine” side and act on it.
2. Pause before you react
When emotions spike, your first impulse might not be the most helpful one. Creating a small gap between the trigger and your response can give you space to act with intention instead of regret.
Quick version: Breathe in for four seconds, and out for six seconds. Then, choose your next move.
Deeper version: Say what you’re feeling out loud or in your head, such as “I feel irritated.” Then name your value (like, “I want to stay calm”), and choose a response that reflects that value.
Related read: Respond vs react: 5 tips to slow down (and why it's important)
3. Reflect on your day with care, not critique
Looking back on your day with honesty helps you build self-awareness and grow. Even small insights can help you adjust and feel more grounded over time.
Quick version: Ask yourself three questions: What went well? What didn’t? What will I try differently tomorrow?
Deeper version: Reflect on each of the four values — wisdom, courage, fairness, and self-control. For each, ask, “Where did I practice this? How could I have done better?”
4. Set a clear intentions before the day begins
Before the noise of the day takes over, give yourself one quiet moment to choose how you want to show up. This small act of direction can help guide your tone and energy.
Quick version: Fill in the blank. “Today I will practice ___ (patience, honesty, courage) during ___ (a meeting, a hard conversation, traffic).”
Deeper version: Picture the parts of your day that might be stressful or unpredictable. How can you stay grounded in your values when they happen?
💙 Learn to set Better Intentions with Jay Shetty on the Calm app.
5. Mentally prepare for small setbacks
You can’t avoid every inconvenience, but you can reduce their power. Lightly imagining everyday frustrations ahead of time can help you meet them with more calm when they show up.
Quick version: Think of one likely hassle, like a delayed train or tech glitch. Then, imagine yourself handling it calmly.
Deeper version: List three things that might go wrong that day. For each, come up with a simple, steady way you’ll respond.
6. Take a step back when needed
Zooming out helps you stop small problems from taking over your entire day. It’s a way to remember what actually matters in the long run.
Quick version: Imagine looking down from the ceiling, then the building, then the sky. How small does the issue feel from each view?
Deeper version: Ask yourself, “In a week or a month, will this still matter?” Write down one thing that will, and one that won’t.
7. Practice being a little uncomfortable
You don’t have to throw yourself into chaos. But choosing small discomforts on purpose can help build confidence and resilience, especially when life gets unpredictable.
Quick version: Try a 30-second cold shower finish, take the stairs, or leave your phone behind on a short walk.
Deeper version: Choose one weekly challenge that stretches you slightly, such as a brave conversation, a new routine, or a social reach-out. Reflect after: What did I learn?”
Related read: Scared to step out of your comfort zone? Here's how to manage
8. Work with what’s in front of you
Fighting reality often adds more stress. Accepting the moment as it is doesn’t mean giving up, but it does allow you to choose to respond with clarity instead of frustration.
Quick version: Say, “This is what the current situation is,” and list it out. Then ask, “Given that, what’s my next best move?”
Deeper version: Turn the challenge into a practice where you fill in the blanks. “Because this happened, I will show up with ___ (patience, focus, grace).”
9. Check in with a “wise voice”
When you’re unsure what to do, borrow the perspective of someone you trust or admire. It helps you step back from the emotional moment and tap into steadier guidance.
Quick version: Ask, “What would a wise friend or mentor do here?”
Deeper version: Make a short list of people (real or historical) whose judgment you respect. When something feels unclear, write the advice they’d give you in one sentence.
💙 Need some extra support? Press play on the Stoic Wisdom for Modern Life masterclass with Ryan Holiday on the Calm app.
10. Act in alignment with your values
You might not always feel in control of your circumstances, but you can choose to act with integrity regardless. Bringing your values in, even when you make small choices, builds consistency and trust in yourself.
Quick version: Before you start a task or conversation, choose one value to guide it, like fairness, honesty, or patience.
Deeper version: Once a week, rate yourself 1–5 on each of your core values. Choose one tiny action to raise your lowest score.
11. Remember your time is limited
Life is short, but that doesn’t have to be a scary thought. In fact, it can be a powerful way to focus your energy on what really matters, especially when you feel pulled in too many different directions.
Quick version: Say, “Time is limited.” Then, choose what feels meaningful to spend it on on any current day.
Deeper version: Write a two-line reflection: “If today were my whole story, what mattered most?” Adjust your plan if needed to include more of what’s important to you daily.
12. Care for yourself and others
Stoicism isn’t just about staying calm alone. It’s also about being fair and helpful in your community. Even small acts of kindness can be part of your daily values. Don’t forget to reflect that kindness to yourself as well.
Quick version: Do one act of service today, like sharing a helpful resource, asking someone how they’re doing, or making a thoughtful introduction.
Deeper version: Form a small circle in which you trade reflections, check in on values, and support each other through hard days.
💙 Explore the power of Connection with Tamara Levitt on the Calm app.
What is stoicism FAQs
Is Stoicism the same as hiding emotions?
Not at all. Stoicism is often mistaken for emotional suppression, but that’s a myth. The Stoics didn’t believe you should deny or bury your feelings. Instead, they encouraged noticing emotions, understanding where they come from, and deciding how to respond.
Feeling angry is natural, but exploding at a coworker may not get you very far. A Stoic approach would be to acknowledge the anger, pause, and then choose a calmer, more constructive response.
Can Stoicism help with anxiety or stress?
Yes, and it does so in practical ways. Anxiety often comes from trying to control things that are out of reach. Think, other people’s reactions, the future, or random circumstances.
Stoicism teaches you to sort what’s within your control—like your actions, choices, and mindset—from what isn’t. This mental shift can reduce the constant pressure you might put on yourself to fix everything. Over time, having a Stoic perspective may help you feel steadier, less reactive, and more capable of moving through stress.
Who were the most famous Stoic philosophers?
The three most famous Stoic philosophers were Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, and Epictetus.
Marcus Aurelius was a Roman emperor who kept a private journal of reflections, later published as Meditations.
Seneca was a statesman and playwright who wrote letters about handling wealth, loss, and time.
Epictetus was once enslaved, and he taught people that freedom comes from mastering your mind, rather than external circumstances.
Their writings were practical guides for living, published in order to help people handle hardship with dignity and strength.
How is Stoicism relevant in daily life?
Even though Stoicism is over 2,000 years old, its tools fit neatly into modern life. Think about moments that cause you stress, like dealing with traffic, managing work deadlines, or navigating family dynamics. Stoicism gives you ways to approach these situations with less frustration and more clarity.
By practicing small Stoic habits like pausing before reacting, reflecting at the end of each day, or focusing only on the things you can influence, you slowly build resilience. While these aren’t dramatic changes, over time, they help you move through daily life with a steadier, calmer mindset.
How do I start practicing Stoicism?
The best way to begin practicing Stoicism is to start small. Pick one Stoic exercise, like a nightly reflection or a simple “control check” during a stressful moment, and stick with it for a week. You could also journal or read some of the ancient texts if you want to go deeper into the practice.
Returning to these tools consistently is key to making it a habit. The philosophy comes alive when it’s lived… not just read.
Calm your mind. Change your life.
Mental health is hard. Getting support doesn't have to be. The Calm app puts the tools to feel better in your back pocket, with personalized content to manage stress and anxiety, get better sleep, and feel more present in your life.
Images: Getty
